Has anyone ever noticed how easy it is to cross your legs when you wear those really slippery sweat pants? - Jaret

I just looked at my feet in a full length mirror and god you guys must think I'm an asshole... - Jaret

I have decided that people that refuse to check baggage when flying were once, and could possibly still be, bed wetter's. - Jaret

If I could fly, I always wonder if I would still drive early in the morning time. I mean, I can't even get myself to do 10 pushups...let alone flap my freakin arms up and down 2000 times per second. - Jaret

Don't you hate it when someone spits in your eye during a conversation...you feel like you are doing something wrong when you wipe it out, so sometimes you wait a second...this means you have forgotten to listen to them and have been consumed by a small bit of salivated that is now drying in your eye...when this happens to me, I sometimes hock a loogy and fire at right in the persons mouth, just do buy some time to dry the eye... - Jaret

Here are a few things I hate...

• Guys, even bald guys, that don't use shampoo. For some reason that pisses me off.
• People that cross their arms, but without crossing them. They just fold one OVER the other. One hand grabs a rib, the other, an elbow. If you have ever done this in a photo, I hope you are happy with yourself.
• Guys who say bro AND dude. I think a choice needs to be made here.
• Drunk people when I am sober.
• Tall guys on the front row of anything, unless I am not paying attention to what it is they are watching.
• Short girls BEHIND tall guys that complain about not being able to see, instead of moving to a less vertically challenged spot.
• Door guys in las angela's california.
• People that work in the food industry, but think they are meteorologists.
• People who climb things for no reason.
• Waiters that sit down at the table with you while taking your order.
• People in their mid twenties that still hate someone they haven't seen since high school.
• Myself when I say stupid shit.
• Dentists.
• Hemorrhoids.
• Cars that look like shoes.
• Drivers that shift lanes more than their quota, which is basically based on my feelings at that particular moment.
• The fact that french fries are so bad for us, but are served with, and go well with, fucking everything.
• Mice...even that little Mickey.....I hate mice....Stuart Little is cool, but I think just cause he doesn't act like an asshole to the cat.....oh and he sounds like michael j fox when he talks......
• coffee....
• Basketballs that don't quite have enough air to bounce right, but do have enough to look inviting to those who like to bounce balls....
• People that speak their mind.....I really think we should keep more bottled up as a society.....